Telling someone your HIV status can be tricky for many of us, even if you’re HIV negative. You may be iffy about your HIV status, there might have been that time when you didn’t use a condom, or you might not have been tested in a while.
Most of us have been unsure of our HIV status at some point. There are lots of reasons why we might or might not tell someone that we’re unsure.
Guys tell each other their HIV status before hooking up often because they want to show their partners that they care about their health, because they want to be honest, and to reduce anxiety about sex.
But sometimes it’s harder to have that conversation. We often think that telling him our status will mean we won’t get laid, that there will be no “right time” to talk about it, or even that it’s really none of his business. Or maybe we’re drunk or high and just forget to have the conversation altogether.
We talk about sex with people that we want to hook up with all the time, whether we do it with words or actions – it’s a part of the dance. We ask him whether he’s a top or a bottom, single or partnered, looking to hook up or maybe for a date. We tell him similar things about ourselves.
Sometimes that information is pretty clear cut, and sometimes it’s not.
There’s more to tell him than just HIV status.
There’s also likes and dislikes and how sure you are of your HIV status.
I was walking down the street yesterday while having a few drinks, a great night overall, and I saw your ad on the bus shelter near hot cookie. Why is it that the Black guys "hasn't been tested in 2 years?". Is STOP AIDS the organization that has any room to say ANYTHING about the state of black men's health if they've done SO LITTLE, historically, for Black men to begin with? I GOT SO PISSED OFF. I hate it. As if the CASTRO WASN'T UNINVITING FOR BLACK MEN ALREADY. Poor judgement on behalf of african american men... AGAIN.